Talk:Eventi A. Takeshi-Meso/@comment-5431934-20140116023735

The ability of the drones to altar the shape into "anything she wishes" is not only outside of what seems to be physically possible with any form of mechanics, but is also quite overpowered. Regardless of whether or not she uses said multitude of forms to its full nigh-limitless potential is irrelevant so long as they contain the ability to do so.

With the elemental attributes that you've attributed to the drones, what exactly do you mean by attribute? Do they burn/freeze their foes when they strike? Do they shoot their element of choice? In addition, how does writing in Dust give them their power? Dust seen in the canon is evidently used in tandem with either mechanics or semblance, such as what is seen from Myrtenaster and Weiss' glyphs.

Not only is the cloaking machine far outside the boundries of what we've seen thus far of the technology, it being build by and eight-year-old makes it even more unbelievable. In addition, it's never explained exactly how it functions - do they have to stay by it? Is it portable? By undetectably, do you merely mean invisible or do they vanish from all five of the senses?

Again with the drones; how do they float? Is there some form of propulsion system incorporated in their design that you didn't mention, a propulsion system which would likely require advanced circuitry and mechanics, which would logically take up more of the space, leaving the drones even less capable of shifting form.

The voices in her head would lead one to believe that she has some form of mental illness, not mentioned elsewhere in teh page. In addition, you seem to have given the drones some form of sentience, and AI is currently something rejected by the reviewing staff.

A 16yo, albeit one with evidently sentient weapons, defeating what is worded as a large number of grimm with what appears to be little-to-no prior combat training or experience? Consider that Weiss and Ruby, both with presumed training, had issue fighting the small group of Beowolves in the Emerald forest, although that could be attributed to their bickering. Consider also the durability of the Ursas Yang fought, also in the forest.

At what point did she get to know Weiss? Nowhere in the backstory is it mentioned that she had any interaction with the heiress, let alone enough to become friends. This seems even more likely when you consider Weiss' demonstrated coldness.

At one point, you state that she got the drones at age nine. In another, however, you stated that she got them at age eight. Please rectify said continuity error.

For the aforementioned issues,

Rejected.

--RP Moderation Team--

Comments unrelated to acceptance:

You mention knights in Titan. What do you mean by this? As in, plate-mail wearing, sword-toting medieval style knights, or perhaps some form of village guard that fights Grimm? They're only mentioned once.