User blog:Xanneer/Story review

Ok, its me again. I blog too much huh? Alright, so after like about 2 weeks of minor edits, revisions, changes, additions, and writing an entire story in iPod Touch notes (in like 3 to 4 days), I think I've finally finished with my story. I would like to kindly ask any willing participants to read my short story "A Pawn's Tale."

http://rwbyfanon.wikia.com/wiki/A_Pawn's_tale

The story is about maybe a 15-20 minute read, maybe 10 if you're a fast reader. There are some slight spelling errors here and there but they're like once in a blue moon. Anyone who took the time to read please leave a review and let me know about what you think. What you thought about the story, the characters, the writing, the combat, everything. Thank you for your time.