User blog:Jadefire62/An Update

Hey, guys. I don't usually make these, however, this time, you guys deserve to know what's going on.

I'll admit it: I've been lazy, to say the least. I haven't been keeping up with anything. And it's time I got around to telling why.

I don't know how many of you already know this, but I'm a teenager, 15-years-old. Long story short, I'm going through the phase where I'm learning more about myself. It's become a very long process, and during it, I've had a lot of realizations, especially the past couple weeks. And some of them... well, they've been a little hard on me. Honestly, I can barely type right now - I keep reaching for the tissue box.

I won't go into details on most of it, but there's one thing that does tie into my laziness. Actually, lazy might be the wrong word for it. It's more... I'm just unmotivated. And it's more than just simple teenage stuff. Tbh, I'm not sure what it is. I'll admit it could be depression, but it could also be a combination of things, or maybe it's something entirely different, perhaps a fear of something. I really don't know.

Now, perhaps I shouldn't be saying all this on the Internet, but like I said: You guys deserve to know what's going on. It's not fair to you, that I keep slacking without saying anything. Anyway, that's the biggest reason behind everything. Though some of it is also regular people stuff - forgetfulness, busy schedule, etc.

I also, for those who don't know, have ADD. Kinda like ADHD, but without the hyperness. Even with medication, I tend to switch between focuses, simply because I get bored with routine. I'll focus on the wiki stuff for a while, then go on to something else, then something else, maybe go back to wiki, then games, then TV, then something else. It's a never-ending cycle, but not one that's very orderly. I could go from books to wiki to books again, then suddenly switch to gaming. The length of time also differs. I could be focused on something for a week, or almost half a year. It tends to depend on when I get something new - probably because that gets me motivated to do something.

At the same time, I also have OCD - and yes, it's a very weird combination. So, even though I get bored with routine, I still make them, fall into them. ... *sighs* Just know I'm not trying to ignore you guys on purpose. Skip me if you have to, but I'd prefer it if you could get in touch with me first. I have managed to make a habit of checking the wiki often, usually at least once a day, so my message wall really is the best place, unless the notifications are acting up. Of course, I go on other wikis as well, so as long as their notifications aren't acting up, you can contact me through 'em.

Well, I'm off. See you guys soon. Or maybe later. Idk. ~ Jade