Talk:Zane R Slate/@comment-24087318-20140113141503

Non-official Review as Requested by Keithv999

He posesses an abnormally large amount of weapons, a Sniper Rifle-Sword, a dagger, AND an assortment of throwing knives. Compare this to Ruby, Yang and Pyrrha who carry a Sniper/Scythe, two Gauntlets, and a Sword/Spear/Rifle and Shield. He's got quite a few too many weapons compared to these canon characters, who only have their weapon, or multiple copies of the same, and occasionally with a shield sidearm to assist them in close.

His Semblance is a little wonky, and doesn't at all work alongside his other weapons and skills to create a single, solid combat style. I'd suggest looking over http://rwbyfanon.wikia.com/wiki/Semblances_and_your_OC_-_A_Guide as a reference and ideas as to what Semblances are capable of, and how they're used in RWBY.

Other than those two points the character seems pretty decently made, though there's a few spelling errors here and there, and a few grammatical/structural mistakes that make things flow a little awkwardly.