Talk:Kerria Legna/@comment-27743663-20170115185401

CNR, I'd assume you want to base it on the Heavenly lights pertaining to white? That's not really clarified. You give about 3 different name meanings and none which are given a relation to a color.

Appearance is fine, though on that, the pictures. It's fine if you use pictures not commissioned or made yourself for an OC, but you do need to credit the artist. They went through hardwork to make those images, and they deserve the credit for it. On that, with so much different art, it serves to contradict itself a bit from what is given in the appearance, none of them really showing an amazonia build. This is all just notes though, not rejectable.

Personality, while fine, I'd reccomend shortening. It's longer than her backstory, which is typically a red-flag in some cases regarding length. There is one note though about her intuitiveness. In most cases, being able to pick apart someone's strengths and weaknesses in a few short a seconds to plan around, is largely going to be a no. In an RP environment, someone who can do that with ease could considered to fall under god-modding. Just a note though.

Backstory is fine.

Aura, we don't know the full capabilities of aura besides danger detection, a force-field, and being used with weapons. While something like an aura martial artist (while likely possible, example being Ren), we have yet to see enough or been given enough information to prove how it works, similar to injecting Dust into one's self. Something like a pushing away affect through force alone, while interesting, isn't really confirmed as possible.

Weapon is fine. Just note, unlike Grimm, people who have aura, making bullets largely useless until it runs out.

Semblance, is essentially buffs. However, it's not listed how long the buffs last, how many people she can affect at once, or what the maximum is she can give as a buff. The cost is implied to be her own aura to raise said stats of people, essentially giving it away to act as a buff, which is fine. Really, it just needs limit clarifications.

As a whole though, I've heavily recommend you shorten and summarize the pages content. Looking at and reading pages that are so long are largely a huge turn-off at first glance for anyone that looks, since it just involves much more work to get through.

Tl;dr

Rejeced on:

- CNR needs clarification on how it relates to a color

- Full Aura capabilities canon wise are unknown, so it's unconfirmed whether the effects of her aura are possible.

- Semblance needs further limit clarifications.

~RP Moderation Team~

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