Board Thread:News and Events/@comment-24296957-20150113152446/@comment-13593058-20150121035643

  Breyal Yoland’s Review 

 Appearance: 



 While appearance is not really a criteria to reject a character on. With Breyal, her appearance is nothing that would provide any excuse for rejection.



 Personality: 



 Almost the same case with Appearance, personality usually does not affect acceptance or rejection unless it contradicts with itself. Breyal’s personality is good.

 Backstory: A respectable backstory about the effects of bullying and how the character overcame it through help and even acceled. Nothing wrong here.



 Weapons and Abilities: 



 This is where I start being nitpicky, as this trait will be the deciding factor if this character is playable in our RP boards. Weapon seems a bit similar to Yang’s Ember Celica, however, as Ember Celica are, in fact, shotgun gauntlets that shoot Dust rounds, and this OCs weapon of choice are actual boxing gloves with an elemental twist instead of shots, I suppose you get away with a technicality. It’s good, but not original I would say.



 Semblance: 



<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> What I look for here is if this is OP (over powered), and this Semblance certainly is not as it scales with how well the user can use it and has a set drawback. My only issue with it is the name which does not really compliment her theme as a joking boxer but more like a serial killer or mad scientist. Still not a legit reason to reject though, so that’s okay.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Final: Accepted

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;">  Chloe Chroma Review 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Appearance: 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> While appearance is not really a criteria to reject a character on. With Chloe, this is absolutely a problem and the first argument for rejection or at least, held until further notice. One, no character should be all colours (at least as we have seen, one colour, one character). Two, the name of the character should represent his/her colour (In this case, Chloe is derived from Greek for stem, or shoot which would imply green. Three, even if multiple colours were allowed, the changing of such colours are never explained and thus, flawed.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Personality: 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Almost the same case with Appearance, personality usually does not affect acceptance or rejection unless it contradicts with itself. Chloe’s personality is good and I like that fact that she get’s excited by science topics, it is a nice touch.

<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Backstory: This part is just plain missing.

<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Weapons and Abilities: This is where I start being nitpicky, as this trait will be the deciding factor if this character is playable in our RP boards. Weapon is good with its practicality and the fighting style compliments it through the use of the well rounded “type swap” mechanic. I will also assume that this weapon suites the character because of the Semblance, but you should probably elaborate on that.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Semblance: 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> What I look for here is if this is OP (over powered), and this Semblance certainly is not although it might be a bit confusing for those who have trouble comprehending written text. Semblance also ties into the weapon making a strong connection between them which is rare. Good job.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Final: '''Rejected on two reasons. '''

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> One, while the Weapons and Semblance are VERY well written, the backstory is still missing which is a nono, and two, the colour scheme rule must be enforced here, rainbow is not a colour, it’s a collection of colours. For RWBY OC’s their colour is what defines them, it gives their meaning, having all the colours is just… not a thing we can confirm or in my opinion, will not be a thing, ever.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> '' If you think this is a mistake, you can ask another reviewer for a second opinion, if the outcome is different, please allow me and the said reviewer to discuss why. ''

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;">  Denver Verde Review 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Appearance: 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> While appearance is not really a criteria to reject a character on. With Denver, this is not a problem.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Personality: 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Almost the same case with Appearance, personality usually does not affect acceptance or rejection unless it contradicts with itself. Denver’s personality is good.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Backstory: 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> A good story about finding one’s interests based on nurture. I like how his personality reflects the stereotypical engineer of professional mechanic of, “less words, if it moves, it does it’s job”.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Weapons and Abilities: 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> This is where I start being nitpicky, as this trait will be the deciding factor if this character is playable in our RP boards. Weapon is good, nothing too special or out of the ordinary and the onboard program is fine as it does not act by itself, only does calculations. However, you should probably state its limitations for RP purposes and explain his construction of a bow versus other weapons.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Semblance: 

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> What I look for here is if this is OP (over powered), and this Semblance is quite ambiguous. Ambiguity promotes over-poweredness and godmodding to a certain extent. Either the full Semblance and its limitations are stated fully, or you put no Semblance at all

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Final: Rejected for 2 reasons.

<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> One, weapon lacks any stated disadvantages. While it does not sound OP by any means, withholding information might troublesome RPers and give them a difficult time.

<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> Two, Semblance is lacking. He has two glyphs and are working on the other two. It is too ambiguous and can lead to godmodding which is not allowed in RPs. Either state the whole Semblance with it’s limitations and applications or just don’t make a Semblance at all.

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<p dir="ltr" style="margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"> '' If you think this is a mistake, you can ask another reviewer for a second opinion, if the outcome is different, please allow me and the said reviewer to discuss why. ''