Talk:Nickelae Vânt Kojote/@comment-24087318-20150121175827

Spelling errors. Spelling errors everywhere. This entire page gives me a headache trying to comprehend it, but here goes.

He seems to have two Faunus traits, those being the heterochromia, and the coyote ears.

He has his weapon, which is, from its description, essentially a combination of Raven and Adams Katanas, (Katana, Rifle combo, rotating dust mechanism in sheath.) And with a few extra features for good measure.

The character himself is strong, smart, fast, and excells with people, and in essence is overall good at everything and anything to some degree.

With the martial arts he knows, it needs outlining how many styles he knows, utilizes and is proficient in.

Pets, ok. Combat pets, sure. Combat pets with advanced weaponry? Probably not. We havn't seen anything remotely like that.

His semblance seems to be a little...difficult to read, mainly from the grammar and spelling. He summons spectral animals or something? It's incredibly hard to make out.

The multiple personality disorder seems completely unnessicary; this character already has so much going on everywhere else, it's just entering Mary-Sue territory and I havn't even gotten to the backstory yet.

Backstories written from a character perspective are neat, but best delegated to separate pages. Character bios are meant to be informative first, entertainment second. It highlights his backstory, or at least aspects of it, but doesn't go into detail and stays subjective to the character telling it.

All in all...the character has way too many things going for it, enough so that you could split it into multiple characters and still have something workable. What's there is very overplayed and stereotypical and makes the character out like a Mary-Sue where he can do most everything competently with no real drawbacks or weaknesses.

As such, Rejected.

~RWBY Fanon Administration Team~

Not really related to the review...but the whole multiple personality thing, elements of his backstory, his Faunus type, and the majority of his personality traits are incredibly overdone. Back when I reviewed regularily I'd see them in a vast number of characters. Too many to be comfortable with. Please do remember the O, in OC, stands for Original, not "What everyone else is doing."