Talk:Zephryn Hollow/@comment-31408668-20190214221605

COLOR NAME REFERENCE

Color name reference is recognized. Zephrine means "breeze". The name has an English origin, while it's root "Zephyrus" comes from Greek, meaning "west wind".

APPEARANCE

Nothing to detract from here. The appearance is short and concise, and very easy to read. No problems here.

PERSONALITY

The personality works. It is clear and concise, painting a picture of a more quiet and pulled back childlike character. It makes sense that she would easily take to someone that she looks up to, such as the Lanterns, hence following them. No obvious contradictions. No problems here.

BACKSTORY

The backstory is maybe a bit short, but the pieces that are given does paint a whole picture. The only thing missing, in my opinion, is a bit more about her time with the Lanterns. However, it is clearly defined that she is with them, so that is fine. Mention of Battle of Beacon is noted. No stepping on canon toes. No problems here.

WEAPONS AND COMBAT

Her weapons are within guideline specifications. We have a single, transforming primary in the form of Absolution. I think I can picture the weapon in my head, it being a sideloaded sniper rifle. The only thing I would want to know more is the exact traits of the ammuntion, say; can it fire Dust Rounds? But overall, a simple and clean description. No major problems here.

As for her skills with her weapon, they make sense, considering her lengthy training with sniper rifles. Her use of her Semblance is very clever, and it integrates nicely into her role as a dedicated sniper.

SEMBLANCE

Tinker as a Semblance works well. It has a control size limiter, along with a focus limiter. I would imagine that it wouldn't tire her out much at all, considering it's limited size and effect. The note that a magazine is too big to control is nice, since it gives a very clear limit to the size of object she can control. No problems here.

CONCLUSION: ACCEPTED

'''Zephryn is a fine character. I can't see any particular problems at all, which is good. Everything is very clear cut, which is very nice. My only advice is maybe defining a tiny bit more about Absolution, but it's not necessary. Zephryn will fit right in here.'''