Talk:Cyzarine Bluthardt/@comment-SelenaZephyr-20141110054541

Okay, the characters backstory has a lot of elements to it, and frankly, is basically a fan-fiction on the page. It could be easily condenced and the events abridged to make it a smoother reading experience. (A bio page isn't supposed to be the characters entire personality and autobiography, just a snippet of who they are.)

Beyond that, there's a few issues to bring up.

During a lot of the characters bio, she's described in a way that makes her seem like everybody finds her appealing. The generalization is a bad idea to do from an RP aspect, and essentially mind-controls every character into seeing that in her, which frankly isn't true. Speaking in absolutes is never a good thing.

The idea of injesting blood for her Semblance poses a few medical issues. Namely blood isn't exactly the healthiest thing to drink straight up. Drinking too much makes you sick and that's not going into problems with clotting and the blood type being incompatible and multiple other things. (Seriously, look it up.)

Her backstory doesn't quite make sense, with family members popping out of nowhere. And given her wounds, even WITH her Semblance, she'd still be at a heavy disadvantage against three other people who have her same level of training.

As for her weaponry, having multiple unarmed combat styles, twin pistols, twin whips, a combination with both the whips, and then all four weapons is frankly, too many weapons. Unarmed combat styles count as a Weapon under the Fanons weapon rules (Which impose a hard limit of TWO separate weapons) which means she'd either have to get rid of them, the pistols, or the whip. And the fact the two weapons she does posess combine means she has too many weapon forms (Weapons, to the Fanon Rules, may have three combat forms at maximum, with a compact form being optional and not counting.) She has the All-Combine, the Whip-Combine, the Whips, and the Guns. For a total of Four. One over the limit.

Her Semblance has a few issues. Namely with the fact Blood is an activator. In RWBY, characters have Aura. This protects them from the majority of greivous wounds and damage, but only has a finite amount with which it can continuously do this. In order to activate her Semblance naturally, she would need to take a hit that was not blocked by Aura. And as we've seen with Huntsmen fighting Grimm and machines, things that do not have Aura, their weaponry cuts right through. The same would happen to her if she lowered her Auras protection over her, and that would mean if her Aura goes down she wouldn't have a chance either.

Another is that increasing her pain tolerance doesn't actually change physical injuries from affecting her. A twisted ankle would still impair her ability to move, a broken arm would be rendered unusable. It also doesn't increase her physical strength/speed/endurance. Which goes with the earlier comment about how there's a VERY unlikely chance she'd have beaten those other three huntsmen given her arm was already rendered unusable, and it was three on one.

Due to all these, Rejected

~RWBY Fanon Administration Team~