Thread:Kervin555/@comment-24857097-20140829003346

Your review is very helpful and I'm now revising his page! Although, there are things I want to explain and ask.

Appearance and Art

The artwork was made before I made it my duty to improve his appearance. The artwork wasn't how I expected it to be, but it was a free commission opportunity and I needed some artwork at that time. I have friends who said that they can help me with getting better art and design. So for now, I'm keeping the reference images so they can see his page and know what to do.

Too Real

I understand about him being too much of a "real-life" person, I didn't realize I was going too far with that until you pointed that out. It didn't seem to bother the reviewers so I left those there. I'll keep the part about real-world references, but I'll change the others to make it more lore-friendly.

Backstory

Should I remove the section about the strange dreams he had? Would Downtown Vale or Atlas make more sense rather than the suburbs? He is a military guy and it's starting to seem that Atlas is the most logical homeland for him, but I don't know. Maybe I should remove the description that links to Ruby.

Conclusion

It was my aim to make him as American as possible without breaking the rules and lore. I want to thank you for reviewing and giving out pointers. Have a nice day! 