Thread:KuraiJack/@comment-40226952-20190814021709/@comment-13488655-20191028213320

Ok I think I see several issues. But honestly this is better than before.

For starters, ..... Everyone has a semblance. Even freaking Jaune. It comes with the aura. It comes with the aura. It's like a bow and arrow. They come together.

For someone who is quite skilled in arem combat.... He sure has lots of weakpoints in his fighting style. Weak to long range, even if you may try to justify it with him swinging bullets out of the air, no hand to hand combat skills, making him a fully grown man version of Ruby. Possibly too many weapons. I forget what the weapon point limit here is on the fanon but that's just because it's late while writing this,

His personality section is kinda bland atm but I'll definetely say it is decent. Reationships could be expanded upon.

The mace I like along with his relationship with it. It's honestly really good and nicely planned out. Great job on that one.