Talk:Silver Herondale/@comment-25924729-20181129090947

Hmm... Don't see a lot of adult OCs on this site, or at least those as old as this. Could be interesting.

Appearance and personality section are alright, nothing to really comment on. Lack of a semblance is noted too.

His backstory is alright, but pretty confusing at parts, especially when talking about Scarlet and Clancy. The entire last paragraph on Scarlet's part is hard to read, and the reason he thinks Clancy is a useless student isn't properly explained. Granted, these are fixed by explanations in the Relationship section, but still given the important role they play in his life it should have been understandable in the backstory alone. This isn't rejectable, but something that can really be improved on.

Having simple weapons is alright, I've approved an OC of yours doing a similar thing before, and the same conditions apply here. Yes, you can have many normal weapons instead of a custom one. But they are subject to the weapon limit rule, and he can only use or carry 2 weapons at a time, whatever they are. Any more is subject to rejection.

He seems very powerful based on his abilities, but I guess it's justified with over 30 years of combat training. However there is a contradiction in the first and last paragraphs, which say he is extremely fast, and then he is slowed down by age respectively. You must clarify which one is correct, and remove the other one, is he fast or slow?

Overall not the best character I've seen, in terms of writing quality and adherence to rules and guidelines. But it's mainly for the last reason I cannot accept him.

Rejected.

If you have any questions please DM me on Wikia and Discord.

~RP Moderation Team~